Friday, December 14, 2012

Back to Work

So I've been back to work for 3 weeks now.  I had to miss my second day back because Brody was having flu like symptoms.  Then Kayla got sick.  Two weeks ago.  And yesterday, we found out she has another double ear infection (which I kinda felt was the case the whole time, after Justin told me she pointed at her ear and said owie.)  But anyways, back to work...

I love my job, but it was so so hard to watch my kiddos go out the door that first day.  It's especially hard to let Brody go.  I never had to leave Kayla with anyone for 8 months.  I was really lucky that way.  I do truly love working part time and being able to stay home with my kids the rest of the time.  Honestly, my 10 hour days at work are sometimes easier than my days at home with Kayla and Brody.

Brody's been a pretty terrible napper and occasionally pretty cranky because of gas.  Kayla has been overly fussy and needy for a few weeks so.  She often refuses to nap which leads to long horrible afternoons trying to keep Brody asleep and keep her happy and make dinner.  But no matter how hard a day I have with my kids, it NEVER makes watching them leave on work days any easier.  I want to talk about them all day at work.  I'm sure I light up when people ask me about them.  (I don't particularly like when 2 patients ask me when I'm due, but whatever.)

I've had this post "pending" for a few weeks now.  I decided to write today because of the tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary School today.  As a mother, this hits especially close to home now.  I have so many mom friends and spend a large portion of my time with little ones.  Tiny humans who know nothing but joy in the simplest things.  Who giggle playing peek a boo with friends and parents.  Who cry when they have a boo boo and just want a kiss and hug to feel better.  Who sometimes ask a lot of their parents it may seem, but who's truly genuine smiles and laughs make all the demands worth it.

I cannot fathom what would cause someone to do something this terrible.  But I cannot imagine watching my child go off to Kindergarten one day and not returning home ever again.  I feel so much for the mothers and fathers of those children lost today.  I feel for the families and friends of all the victims.  And I especially feel for those left behind.  The teachers, faculty and innocent minds of those children who will have a black spot in their memories for the rest of their lives.  No one, especially small children, should ever have to witness a horror like that.

As an alumni of Virginia Tech, these things always get to me.  I am praying for those lost.  I am praying that their families find love and support in their community to help them cope.  I am praying that those left behind at Sandy Hook find the faith to overcome the darkness.

I am also praying for the rest of our country.  For all the mothers and fathers out there.  That they hug their children a little tighter.  Tell them they love them just one extra time.  That they all keep the faith that the majority of people are truly good and we cannot prevent horrible things from happening to us.  We can only make sure we are proud of the people our children grow to be and make sure they know how wonderful and loved they are.

A letter from the President of Virginia Tech:

We of the greater Virginia Tech community know, from our experience, of the unending sorrow and horror that has now descended on the Newtown, Conn., community. No words can express how they now feel over this senseless and insane tragedy. Our words seem so inadequate in light of their plight. Still, we extend our deepest condolences, thoughts, and prayers to the Newtown community as it begins to cope with their grief and blackness.


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